Save-the-Dates

I like to remember dates. I like trying to remember what happened on exact days one, two, or five years ago. Doing so reminds me of how timely the Lord really is, and how He redeems time spent. 

While more of the world reflects back in December,  January has served as a month of reflection for me in a lot of ways. This month has come to hold a lot of mile markers: my birthday, anniversary at Sherwood, and moving to Albany to name a few. 

This year looking back has a few more milestones to it. It was in January of last year where I surrendered to the Lord my fear, I let Adam into my life, and finally, he and I became a "we". Its been fun as these specific dates have gone by to share with each other the apprehensive thoughts we had, and now laugh at how we are discussing registries and guest lists. Or like how today I met with my wedding hairstylist and florist, and a year ago today I was getting ready for our first date. Add on the fact that in 99 days we will get married!

Yep, I like dates.  The counting up and the remembering. The seeing how the Lord works all things together for my good and His purpose (Romans 8:28).

Save your dates friends. Let the Lord bring to remembrance hard and good times. He was there for all of them. 

The Proposal

You may have saw on some type of social media, or maybe heard through the grapevine, but something big has happened in my life. 

4 weeks ago, this guy asked me to marry him...

and I said yes. 

Now if you had a front row seat to watch it all unfold, or if you read this, you can testify that the last ten months have been nothing short of a "But God" moment. One where He stepped in, changed my heart completely, and gave me the gift of falling in love with a man that loves Christ above all. 

This post is tell you our engagement story (mainly because people are supposedly "dying" to hear the story...Tammy and Hank! ;) ). So it's going to be long...because I'm not leaving out the small details. Here's THE story. 

First, let me cover the basic questions: Did I know it was coming? Did I tell him the ring I wanted? The answer is yes and no to both. Adam and I had talked about how the Lord was leading us to marriage, so yes I some what knew it would happen in a certain time frame. He asked what I liked as far as a ring went, but it was a 5 minutes conversation that happened months ago. 

The week before Thanksgiving, Adam was scheduled to help run lights for SCA's high school musical, Beauty and the Beast. This meant rehearsals for Tuesday and Wednesday night, and performances on Thursday, Friday and two on Saturday. I attended the Thursday night performance, and after Adam and I went to eat with our close friends Scott and Marie.

**Side note: We spend a lot of time with Scott and Marie. Its been a joke for a few months that when it comes to secrets Scott is the one to tell, not Marie. Scott is the closest thing to a human Fort Knox I've ever met. No lie. 

At dinner Marie asked if I wanted to go shopping in Tallahassee on Saturday. Thinking Adam would be busy with two performances, I said, "Sure, as long as I don't have to babysit for Renee. She's supposed to let me know if she needs me Friday or Saturday." {Cue first curve ball I threw Adam. Let's just say he made some speedy phone calls the next morning making sure I babysat Friday. Also, I randomly decide to go get a manicure Friday during the day. RANDOM, people. I don't make this a habit.}

Saturday morning comes and I'm getting ready for Marie to pick me up. {Woke up before my alarm, had time to curl my hair, and decided not to look grungy. As in, I put thought into what I was wearing. Again, I'm look back and go, "Why in the world did I do that? That's not really normal of me..."}.

Marie and I drove to Tallahassee, Florida passing through downtown Thomasville, Georgia. This is one of Adam and I's favorite places. It has fun, cool shops and restaurants, and where we went on one of our first dates. That date included a trip to the Big Oak {complete with a park and gazebo}, which is a location that comes into play later :) . Marie at this point mentions that on the way back she'd like to stop and look at the bookstore downtown. 

I need to throw in that at this part of the ride I'm beginning to not feel well. Not full blown car sick, but something similar. We aren't even to Tallahassee yet and I'm wondering if this is such a good idea. But we go on, have lunch at Panera and head to the mall. Of course in the car and walking around we talk "what ifs" of weddings and married life. Its just want girls do... especially if you are two girls in serious relationships. Before we leave the mall we went in a jewelry store, so I could point on the cut of diamond I liked. {Marie ends up talking to a lady who pulls out a ring that looked a LOT like the ring I would see later on in the day.}

Its get to be early afternoon,  and I'm kind of done with the whole shopping thing {which ends up being curve ball #2}. I'm definitely ready to get on to Thomasville. I remembered that the shops closed around 5 or 5:30pm, so I prompt Marie to the idea of heading back. Its only a 30 minute drive to Thomasville, so no big deal... until Marie starts driving 15 mph under the speed limit...which I notice and call her out on. Lucky for her, there were road work signs out. 

We get to downtown and are taking our time looking around the bookstore. What I don't know is that Adam and Scott are FLYING to Thomasville because we are early. {Marie is suppose to have me at the Big Oak at 6pm. Its 5:15pm. I'm ready to eat and go!} I had mentioned to Marie that we could eat dinner at this cool little pizza place, and was starting to hint that I was ready to eat {have I mentioned I didn't feel good?}. So Marie and I get in the car, and I start trying to direct her to the pizza place. She then acts busy on her phone and goes the opposite way for EVERY. TURN. I tell her. She gets all distracted, borderline ditzy, and ends up driving past the Big Oak, which is conveniently a block and a half from the pizza place {walking distance, people. Even though this was not a part of the plan.}. I point out where we are, and she asks about the Big Oak. As I explain what it is, why its important to Adam and I, she parks and I then become busy trying to figure out if the pizza place is open for dinner. I start to walk up to it, then turn to find Marie walking in the opposite direction. {I really think I probably gave her the most confused, aggravated look possible.}

"I thought we'd just walk down there! Check it out before it gets dark." She says with a smile. 

"Ok, sure." Literally thinking, Of course you do. Because this day could not have worked out any other way. My hair is curled.  I like what I'm wearing. We just saw a ring I love. I love this little town, and this would be the perfect opportunity for my boyfriend to surprise me... but he's not. Because he is watching Beauty and the Beast for the fourth time. Lord, please get a hold of these thoughts!! They are ruining my time with my friend!

As we begin walking downhill, I see a little white truck roll through the four-way stop at the corner of the park. 

"Ok, that's just weird." 

Marie mentions something about a nearby house and I feel myself look at her as if she was from another planet. My heart is racing and I'm beginning to walk slower. 

"This isn't happening, Kristin. Get. a. grip. "

We get to the edge of this little park and I see movement under the massive oak tree branches. Out walks Adam from beneath the tree...in a suit...looking pale. Cue me freezing in place. {He says his first thought was , She's really gonna make me walk all the way up to her"}.

He gets to me and it all happened really fast...

Me-"What are you doing here??"
Him-"What do you think I'm doing here?!.. Take a walk with me?"
"Sure..." 
Walking while he says, "I've really lied a lot to you lately..."
"I'm sure it was for a good reason..."
Takes me over to the gazebo stairs. Drops to one knee, "Will you marry me?"
"YES!"

Scott {who rode with Adam} and Marie hid to take some pictures, and came out once we called for them. We celebrated at our favorite restaurant, Jonah's, and called our parents. In between it all, I got the details of Adam's side: from the curve balls I threw him, to the lies he told to cover up the surprise. 

All in all, it was a great night, and the Lord gave us a great story to tell. We have been BLESSED beyond measure by all the love and encouragement we've been given by friends and family. {Also happy to say Scott and Marie got engaged exactly 2 weeks after us!!}

So there you have it: I'm engaged, and the soon-to-be Kristin Crosby. Has a nice ring, don't ya think?

"For the LORD is good; His steadfast love endures forever, and His faithfulness to all generations." Psalm 100:5

Adam.

I couldn't stand him. Could. not. 

Truth be known, he couldn't really stand me either in the beginning. I thought he was arrogant and over confident. He thought I was stuck up and a stick in the mud. 

To make things worse (or more humorous now), we actually told people we didn't really like the other. 

But today... I'm beyond grateful that that's not the end of our story.

After a few months, in the midst of working together and having a few mutual friends, little by little Adam Crosby grew on me. At first it was a tolerance for someone who seemed very different than me. Next, it grew to a respectful camaraderie as co-workers. That's how it stay on my end for a while. I eventually had to admit that the more I got to know him, the more he seemed likable. (But definitely not date-able!)

I can remember that during that time, I shared my thoughts with a godly, much wiser woman in my life. I told her that Adam just wasn't what I was looking for. To me, he didn't seem like a good fit at all, and all the things I wanted in someone (you know, someone not arrogant or over confident). 

Then this dear friend, who is cautious when putting her two-cents in on my life, said to me very sweetly and kindly, "All I'll say is this, you might actually need someone a little confident in your life so he's not a one of these..." as she referred to the rug under her feet.

Ouch.

 I can literally replay in my mind that conversation we had in her kitchen. I can remember how her words stuck to me. They still do. Because while the wall around my heart was 10 feet tall and five feet deep, it was at the moment that the wall cracked the tiniest sliver and I said, "Really, Lord?". 

Shortly after, I finally laid it before God and said,"Ok. I'll be open to the possibility of dating Adam." (do you hear my skepticism?) It was then that I began to see past his, as he would call it, "hard candy shell". I saw his go-getter attitude and drive to do things right and with excellence. His ability to confidently say he would do something and follow it through to the nth degree. His passion to see students in our church grow into godly men and women. Add on the fact the he started making me laugh (it really doesn't take much, but hey, it was new coming from him).

To try and wrap up this story, after four months of saying "Nope" "No" "NO!" to folks around me, myself, and even God, I realized that I actually liked and wanted to spend time with him. So I sat before the Lord, and got REAL honest with Him and myself.

"I'm scared."
"Trust Me."
"God I'm not even sure I like him..."
"Trust Me."
"But what about..."
"Trust Me. "
"But what if..."
"Trust ME. Not him. Not the situation. Me. Take a step, and trust Me."

So after an awkward middle school moment on my end of, "hey..I like you...back", Adam took me out of my 25th birthday. Our first date.

(This is a first of a couple of posts. Stay tuned for the engagement story!)

Bright Plaid Shorts

It never ceases to amaze me all that kids pick up, repeat, remember, or say without any prompting from adults. I guess it is one of the reasons I love children and find them so intriguing. God teaches me so much as I try and see the world from their perspective. Last night was no different.

I did a couple of quick laps around the block with a friend of mine (this whole exercising thing has never been quite my forte'), and then headed  to a dear friend's' house to watch her three year old daughter for a few hours. I show up with Chick-fila in hand, and wearing my "work out" cloths: long sleeve t-shirt, leggings and gym shorts. Cue curious Kerianne...

"Miss Kristin, um why are you wearing shorts over your pants?"

"Well, these are actually leggings, and I wear them to keep my legs warm while I exercise."

"Um well you're wearing shorts over your pants." She said in a "that's ridiculous"  voice.  I just laughed as we sat down to some dinner. 

After a while, she began to dress up and show me her blue and pink wedding dresses (actually, they are princess dresses that she calls wedding dresses and I'm not even sure she's ever been to a wedding... is it innate for little girls to dream of weddings? another topic, another day...). Then all of a sudden she appears in her normal shirt and pants with one addition: a pair of bright plaid shorts. 

"Look Miss Kristin, I match!" 

At first I didn't get it. Only on the second or third time of her saying "I MATCH!" did it dawn on me: she matched ME!

Now, no worries, I don't think I scared her fashion sense for life. But standing in my friend's kitchen, watching her curly headed, bright eyed daughter look up at me with a grin... it all became much more real. 

I'm not saying shorts and leggings are bad. 
I'm not saying they are fashionable. 
They actually look quite ridiculous.

I'm saying that little ones watch, whether they are 3 or 13 or 23. The soak up and pay attention to more details than we realize. I can still name the 12th graders that I watched, as a 6th grader, walk into the cafeteria. My friends and I were enamored with the idea of being the star football player, head cheerleader, and the most popular. 

So they watch, what's the big deal?

The big deal is that as followers of Christ we are to point all people to the cross and our Savior. Point them with our walk, our talk, our dress, our work, our life. 

Praise the Lord that only Christ knows the details and depths of my sin and shortcomings, and uses me anyway. Praise Him that He gives gentle reminders that we are His light in this dark and dying world. Reminders like bright plaid shorts. 

"...I will make you as a light for the nations, that my salvation may reach to the end of the earth." Isaiah 49:6b

My Irons

Without fail, November 1st automatically begins my mental "Thankful" list . Knowing myself, starting a daily post on Facebook would only prove forgetfulness by repeating myself or missing a day.  Last year, I actually posted a list here. 

As the mental list still grows and November comes to an end, there's one item on the list that the Lord seems to be putting in bold and underlining. 

Friends.

Which then brings to mind this verse... 

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

 So here are some of my "irons"...

Diana and I met when I was 16. Through what seemed random, but clearly God-orchestrated course of events and people, Diana and I later became college roommates my second semester at the University of Mobile. She is one of the smartest women I know, and can go on less sleep than anyone ever! Her passion for missions and the nations is contagious. While our stint as roommates wasn't that long, she'll forever be my college roomie. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for her honesty, transparency, and all around love for me in my life. Recently finished at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, she's headed overseas VERY soon, and I couldn't be prouder. The Lord's hand on her life is apparent in so many ways. 

This is Mary. Mary Carlisle that is. I can't really tell you when or how we met(when you live on a small college campus, introductions are sometimes left out. Its the beauty of living life with 500+ other people). But I would say our friendship was fortified as she watched me walk through a hard time in my life, and encouraged me all along the way. Mary is the writer and artist of my friends. She has talent in both areas that can only be attributed to the God we serve. She lives in Nashville and works for Lifeway. Around the holidays, you can probably find us at a Starbucks or Cracker Barrel having coffee as we both travel to our hometowns. Mary is my cheerleader and, thankfully, a skype call away.

Meet Laura Ashley. LA, her husband Lee, and their precious daughter Holland Grace currently live in Raleigh, North Carolina, attending seminary. They will finish soon there and in the next year head overseas as church planters and missionaries. 

Laura Ashley and I weren't super close through the beginning of our college years, but it all kinda changed when we went on a Youth Hostel Mission trip the summer before our final semester of college. LA was my only female friend and confidant (the guys on our team were OK, ;) ) for 32 days as we traveled through Europe learning what living out the gospel really looked like. Her patience with me during those days still amazes me. Watching her become a wife and mommy has been a blessing, even if its been from afar! 

When I first moved to Albany I wrote about my A-team: Ashleigh, Jaye, and Megan. While emails and calls are few and far between these girls are some of my most faithful prayer warriors. A week hardly goes by where I don't thank the Lord for one of them, or our time together as accountability partners. Ashleigh and Megan continue to hold down the fort at UM, while Jaye is working away at seminary in North Carolina. We'll be reunited for the first time since I moved this December! We're heading to New York City for New Years Eve!!

Ever had an unexpected friendship? If you have, you know that these happen at what seems like the most random moments and seem to solidify out of no where. At least that's what it felt like when Haley Casey stepped into my life. I don't know if I have ever been so blunt with someone, and yet they keep coming back for more! 
Haley is a teacher and the BEST bargain shopper I know. Her and her fiance, Jason, keep me laughing and help me lighten up. I'm so thankful the Lord saw fit to have Haley and I crash into each other's lives. Her encouragement in my life is one I try not to take for granted, and look forward to having around as long as I'm in Albany (which she says is forever). Only the Lord knows, Haley!


Last introduction: this is Stephanie. Steph and I work together at Sherwood. She's an incredible wife, mommy, teacher, writer, artist and party planner. I really can't begin to tell you how much this girl means to me. Steph and her husband, Ryan, let me invade their lives over a year ago and we do lots of life together now. From Thursday night dinners to birthday parties to late night talks of life, love, and Jesus. My day was made when their two year old son, Thompson, called me "Aunt Kristin". I love that little boy!!

Thanks for sticking it out and reading this long post. I promise it would be much longer if I mentioned Codi, Amanda, Mary Grace, Kayla... I'm telling you, the list goes on. Man, I am one blessed girl. 

Thank you Lord for these women whom you allow me to call friends. It is by Your grace they are in my life!

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

Josiah.

I'll never forget that spring day my freshmen year of college. The day I was baking a cake in the dorm kitchen and my mom called. She makes small talk, then asks with a laugh,

"Are you sitting down or standing up?"

 "Mom what's wrong?"

"Well, nothing is really wrong..."

"Is it good news or bad?"

"Well I think its good..."

And then it was like I just knew.

"Mom, are you pregnant?"

"Yes."

I would like to tell you that my first response was utter joy, and I behaved like a loving, excited daughter and big sister.

But that did not happen.

Confused, upset, aggravated. I thought they were done!?. Would all be accurate discriptions of how I felt those first few hours (ok, maybe days).

Over the following months, I came to grips with the fact my parents 9th child would grace us with his presence in October. I became excited about becoming a big sister. again. Was even able to be home a little more when Mom was put on bedrest. But I'm pretty sure nothing could prepare me for what we realized on that rainy October 22nd.

"He has DOWNS." was the word I got from my dad.

He what?

It took 3-4 weeks for the blood work to come back to confirm what the doctors suspected. However, it took our family no time to realize we knew little to nothing about Down Syndrome. Mom and Dad had been birthing and taking care of children for 20+ years, and it felt like suddenly they were brand new parents again. We all loved my new brother Josiah so much. Yet, there was this "fear of not knowing".

5 years later, Josiah is a joy and bright spot in my parents' home. Overflowing with personality!

He likes to swing and swim.
He is stubborn. 
He is funny.
He loves ice cream and popcorn.
He wears glasses.
He goes to school.
He snorts when he laughs.
He loves dogs.

Looking back I can see how the Lord placed people in my family's path to guide, help, and understand the next part of our journey. It has been a learning process for all of us, a road that at times (I know for my parents especially) has seemed long and hard. But it has also been a fun ride as a family. We have celebrated the smallest of victories, while smiling and laughing our heads off at seeing this world through Josiah's eyes.

Josiah's journey will probably be a lot different than others his age. But that's something we're ok with as a family. Because he is ours. 

Lord, forgive me for my selfishness as a college freshmen. 

Happy Birthday Josiah! I love you and love being your big sister!

Favorite Moments

To say the last 3 months have been a whirlwind would be an understatement. I keep thinking back and somehow this summer was busier than last year. I read my last blog and know that the Lord knew what He was doing giving that lesson then, ha!

Among my crazy, jam packed schedule were some really fun and favorite moments...

Photo by Angelique Sturm

... I had the honor to be in my friend Amanda's wedding in May. She made a beautiful bride...


 

...Had a young child randomly run up to me on a Sunday night, hug me, and say "Thanks for spending every Sunday with us."...

...Witnessed another friend and her groom worshiped our sweet Savior that brought them together during their ceremony. Oblivious to each other or anyone else...

...Watched 21 5th graders spread their wings and love on people they did not know...

...Held this sweet guy while his mom had her blood pressure checked during my week in Honduras. Saw a hesitant mom smile because we weren't uncomfortable around her little boy...

...saw 30 children stand saying they feel God is calling to some kind of ministry: pastor, missionary, or other vocation...lots of tears that day...



Photo by Hayley Catt

So yea, its been a crazy summer. But having it any other way, just wouldn't be worth it.

Shout for joy in the LORD, O you righteous! Praise befits the upright."

 Psalm 33:1

Be still. Literally.

I have spent the better part of the last week with my planner in hand and my eyes looking at the months of May, June and July over and over again. Its part of my job that I love: the planning. Creating something out of a empty white square on my calendar. The I in my SI-personality (see DISC profile) sees every gathering of people a party. A chance to hang out and get work done...well, maybe the later, definitely the first!

In my family I'm notorious for always doing something, going somewhere, or seeing someone. I've always liked being on the move, never wanting to miss anything. I mean, who would want to miss a party?!

But...yea, big but coming... in all the commotion of my life, two scriptures come to mind. 

"Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted among the earth!" Psalm 46:10

"And He (Jesus) awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm." Mark 4:39

I learned a long time ago that one reason He calls us to "be still" is because we try to fix and do all by ourselves. His call to us to this "be still" is so we stand before Him, with humble adoration and in prayer. Depending on Him to fight the battle, correct the wrong, show the answer, work out the problem. He is faithful to be our Provider and Caretaker.

But then there is this whole other "be still" that the Lord has been working on with me. The actual "being" still part, literally. 

Yea, I'm not so great at it. 

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy an hour by myself laying out by the pool, or getting lost in a book for a few hours. But being by myself a whole lot ain't my thing.

But then when did being still mean being a hermit? Why did I ever think they were equivalent? 

Maybe because some times the Lord saying "be still" literally does mean "don't do anything. don't make dinner plans. don't run errands all over town. stay home". It some times means saying... "No" (Heavens, I don't like to say it!). The social butterfly in me desires to flit about, but my Creator calls me to rest. My body, mind, and soul.

 I think on the next weeks and months, and realize my summer is pretty much planned. Lots of fun and exciting stuff set in place that will no doubt make a memorable season in which I pray God moves. But tonight, I write this sitting out on my balcony feeling a wonderful, God-given breeze in the ever present South Georgia heat. 

Being still before my Savior. Resting.

My Office

Little girls don't grow up dreaming of their own office one day. At least this one didn't.

In college I was assigned to plan my "dream" classroom. After that project I decided it was a good thing I wasn't really planning on teaching because I couldn't afford it, ha.

But since starting a full time job, I've realized why people take time and effort to create an office space they enjoy. I spend more time in the fours walls of my little office than I do awake in my own apartment. During particular times of the year I'm out of it more than in it (summer IS coming), but I always come back to my office.

The decorating process has been just that: a process. Lots of things are mismatched at this point, but a couple of staples you'd find: a large white board, lamps, IKEA chairs, a massive bookcase and a window. How I ended up with a window I will NEVER know, but credit can probably be given to my great boss/pastor. Bottom line: I love my window.

My office. big whoop-ti-doo, right?

Well, here's the thing... its one of my favorite places.

Yes, there is probably 3 month old candy in a jar or bucket...
Yes, there are probably t-shirts in a pile leftover from an event...
Yes, there is probably another stack of supplies for the NEXT event...
Yes, I know there is popcorn on the floor...
Yes, I realize nothing matches and that there is construction work outside...

But its still a favorite place.

In a short time its become a place for sweet, meaningful conversations with friends. A place for laughs around Wednesday staff popcorn. A place for tears behind a closed door when unexpected news hits. A place to view and reflect on the art/cards/pictures made by, and of, my precious kiddos.

But mostly because it is an honest, safe place where I can go before my Father, and where encouragement can go back and forth across my desk.

Praying the Lord has given you a favorite place.

Get up.

Somewhere over the years past I heard a sermon discussing Moses and Joshua. While I do not remember the three points or alliteration, I do remember something that the pastor pointed out...

and its something that God recently reminded me of...

to which I then explained to Him that the story didn't pertain to me at this point in my life...

and we can all guess how that ended.
So let me share the lesson I've learned (actually, still learning).

The last chapter in Deuteronomy tells of the Lord showing Moses the Promised Land. He could not enter, but he saw it from Mount Nebo. The chapter goes on to tell of Moses' death, burial, and the people of Israel's mourning.

I have a feeling that while some might have known that Moses was not to enter the Promised Land, they were shocked when he died. Verse 7 says,

"Moses was 120 years old when he died. His eye was undimmed, and his vigor unabated."

The man the people of Israel had followed through parted water and barren desert was gone and quite suddenly it seems. After Verse 8 goes on to say the days of mourning ended and the hand-off happened. Joshua, son of Nun, was up. He had been blessed by Moses, so they all knew it was coming, and they responded with obedience. **Side Note: can I just say, that's a big deal! Let's think about it... If these people had been wandering in the desert for 40 years, and had dwindled down to only the descendants of Caleb and Joshua... I think it is safe bet to say that those left, had lived their entire lives under Moses' leadership. If not the entirety, then a good bit of it. So they have to trust, follow someone else after spending your life under someone else?? I believe it to be a testament of who they really were submitting themselves to: God Almighty Himself. (Granted, I know that the children of Israel didn't always do what they were suppose to, but at that moment they were on it.)

Moving on. 
Deuteronomy ends, Joshua (and God's lesson for me) begins.
 

"After the death of Moses, the servant of the LORD, the LORD said to Joshua the son of Nun, Moses' assistant, 'Moses my servant is dead. Now therefore arise, go...' "

(Joshua 1:1-2a)

 

Do you really think God needed to inform Joshua that Moses was dead? That somehow he missed it and God needed to highlight the fact that the great prophet wasn't around anymore? That the man who had poured into Joshua and blessed him to lead God's people was GONE?

 

Now, I'm not Joshua, nor am I trying to downplay his role in scripture. He was a man of God and may I remind you one of two that had faith that the Lord would give them the Promised Land (Numbers 13). But in my human flesh I can imagine what it would be like to lose such an important person. To be so consumed with my circumstances that God has to state the obvious.

 

Lord, I miss him...

HE IS DEAD.

They won't trust me....
ARISE.
I can't do this. I can't lead them. How can I?
GET UP. GO...

I try to hold on to things. Good times, good memories, friendships. Re-living in my mind seasons of life that I'm glad God gave me. When I sense God moving me on, I squeeze those things tight and say, "O no God. Please, just let me keep it. Don't make me try something new." So in my clinging and re-living, I don't see the opportunities that God has in front of me. I don't want to move on to try something new or trust something/someone new. So I hold on to what is comfortable and familiar. But as I sat in a corner, holding on for dear life, mourning, sadden that a season is over,  the Lord steps in to end it.

He says... ARISE.
Or is Kristinense: GET. UP. 

Now, please hear me. I'm not saying you shouldn't mourn or be sad when you lose someone or you move on to a different season of life. I'm saying that I have the tendency to dwell  on it past a reasonable time and it takes our sweet Lord intervening to get me out of a rut. He stated the obvious and gave instruction. Because He loves you and I too much and has better things in store for His glory than to let us wallow in a corner.

The rest of verse 2 and 3 say...

"Moses my servant is dead. Now therefore arise, go over this Jordan, you and all this people, into the land that I am giving to then, to the people of Israel. Every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given to you, just as I promised to Moses."

The Promised Land was waiting!!! He was giving instruction to go to the place that they had waited on for YEARS. WHOO HOO! How awesome to look at what was ahead. Better still, God goes on to reminds Joshua how He will be with him just like He was with Moses. How Joshua was not to be frightened or dismayed, but to be strong and courageous (v. 9).

Its time to get up. He promises to not to leave or forsake His own. Why would we delay?

1 Year

The last 2 months have been marked with many 1 year anniversaries. From sending my resume to Sherwood, to my first weekend, to THE interview at Cracker Barrel, to the big move to the small city. I can be very sappy at times, and coming out of the holiday season has probably only made it worse. Its made me look over the last year quite a bit and all the lessons I've learned, the most important I wrote about previously.

Among those lessons, I've learned so much about myself, and about the high points of  life. For example...

• Hearing "Miss Kristin" thrills my heart, and it is a true delight to have a child run up shouting it, while reaching for a hug. I cannot explain it other than to say it is one of those small, sweet gifts from the Lord. With that, comes this unusual "momma bear" instinct that can only come from being around some many precious children.

• It has been cool to see how God ordained certain life experiences to prepare me for this season of my life. For instance, my degree and time spent working at UM aided me in having a teacher and event planner brain all at the same time. Being from a large family has helped know how to handle multiple people of different ages. I always have an example story for a child or parent about one of my siblings, ha. All that to say, the least important  of instants to me, have been purposeful to God's plan.

• It is a great joy to stand by dear friends as they take on a new last name, and holding sweet babies whose parents I call friends. THAT, ladies and gentlemen, I've learned is one of the greatest joys of this life. To watch and be a part of monumental moments of those you have laughed, cried and prayed over...ugh I could cry just thinking about it!

• My brothers and sisters are growing up. A given I know. But it hit me hard this year. Samuel started college, John started middle school, and Madelyn can see the light at the end of the tunnel called high school. Josiah isn't a baby anymore and is a rambunctious little boy. Before we know it, we'll all be married and cramming into my parents house for holidays.

• I don't have to plan every second of my day, and it is healthy for me... sometimes.

All in all, I cannot express how good the Lord has been to me since moving to Albany. Its been a great year, and I am looking forward to however many more the Lord will give me at Sherwood!

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Ephesians 3:20-21

Time flies...

Is it really the end of December? I remember thinking at the being of November, “O good, a couple of slow months to catch up and get ahead.” And while things might have been a little slower in the office, my life didn’t necessarily slow down. But, like my family reminds me, I like being busy.

    November was full of traveling with my first real vacation and Thanksgiving holiday. I visited Jaye in North Carolina and got to see what life as a seminary student is like. I also realized that 5-7 days a year of resting and relaxing is a must. I honestly didn’t realize how rejuvenating it would be. A trip to NC might be a November have-to for the next few years!

    December has been full of parties, gatherings, programs, and a trip home for Christmas. I love the Christmas season, and when I say I love it, I mean I LOVE it! The decorations, the music, the presents, the food... everything! This Christmas had its special moments for me: Putting up my first tree, full of ornaments since my childhood. Participating in the Christmas program at Sherwood. Catching up with old friends in Athens. The extra time spent talking with Samuel, and playing with Josiah. Standing as a family while my dad prayed and passed out the Lord’s Supper on Christmas Eve. Such a sweet time of year to do fun things and remember why we celebrate in the first place: Our Savior CAME!

    As the days of 2011 dwindle down, I’ve been tying up lose ends and working on projects in the office. One of which was to hang this,

Now you might remember we did that whole, revamped VBS back in the summer. One of the afternoon track times was an art track for older kids. They learned about different kinds of art from our very own College and Career pastor, Brian Kelley. Towards the end of the week, they were given a canvas to paint with black lines on it. Little did they know what would be the outcome. Seeing the finished product made me PUMPED for this upcoming summer!!

As I hung the canvases and made them fit together, I was able to stop and read the verses the kids added. Its so cool to see what verses stick out in the mind of a child. Whether its one they recently learned or have memorized and held onto for a long time. I found one that I’m pretty sure an adult got a hold of. It 2 Thessalonians 5:24 written on it,

“The One who calls you is faithful; and He will surely bring it to pass.”

If there was one verse that summed up 2011 for me, it would be this one. 2011 has been a year that the Lord has reminded me of how faithful He is. He has brought so much to pass, its hard to believe I ever doubt His purpose or timing. Also realizing even when it seems like He's not bringing anything to "pass" He is STILL faithful.  His word is quick to settle an anxious heart, by reminding that our God has all things under control. 

It brings me to tears to think of how good and sweet My Savior has been to me this year. Looking forward to watching Him continue to bring things to pass and to be a small part of His mind blowing plan!

Happy New Year!

I am thankful for...

- a loving, merciful, grace giving Savior who adopted me into His eternal family and carries me through this life.

- a mom who is always there to hear my thrills, fears, and tears, and who lifts me up to the Lord daily.

- a dad who calls me his own, gives me godly council and protects me from miles away.

- brothers and sisters that make me laugh, keep me on my knees, and who are always a text, call, or facebook message away :).

- a church family that is unlike any I have ever been a part of. One that has embraced me, and made me feel at home in such a short amount of time. (and feeds me like its going out of style!)

- the fact that 130+ kiddos call me "Miss Kristin", and run to hug me no matter the location.

- a job and ministry that makes me wonder how I could ever do anything else for a vocation.

- the ability to watch families raise children who love Christ and  adopt little ones into their homes to call children.

- the girls that God has intrusted me to pour into, and share my life and love for the Lord with.

- the women that want to "live life" and pray for me.

- Marty, Jaye, and Stephanie, who have taught me the importance of a thank you note :) .

- the opportunity to partner with Compassion International and sponsor Fabin, a little boy in Columbia.

- the staff of Sherwood Baptist Church. Overwhelmed by their love and passion for Christ and His Kingdom. 

- my small 3 room apartment, that I am making home.

- friends in: Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, Kentucky, North Carolina... and the fact that I can see many of them to and from trips to my parents.

I know I'm a couple of days late, but I couldn't let my Thanksgiving holiday end without sharing a few of my "thankfuls". This week has taught me that no matter the circumstance, we are to be thankful. Because the reality is, we are sinners in need of a Savior, and Jesus came to pay the ransom.  That, in and of itself, is reason to be thankful, and to sing our God's praises all the day long. No matter the trial, we are to declare the goodness of our God.

Praise the Lord!

Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good,

for his steadfast love endures forever!

Psalm 106:1

 

Like Anna

Last week I pulled out an old study Bible to do a little studying and I came across a postcard with this picture on it...

So, why do I have a postcard of an old lady in my Bible? Good question. This is actually a picture of a painting by Rembrandt. The orginial hangs in the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam, which I saw in person, May of 2009. I went to the museum while on a misison trip that took me backpacking through Europe. We had a spare afternoon so my fellow team member and I headed out for a trip around town. Thus, the Rijksmuseum...

 

So we're walking around taking in all of the fine art (my appreciation probably lacking) when we came across the above piece. I remember it captured my attention quickly, mainly because of her hand. It is difficult to tell in this picture, but the detail is incredible: the wrinkles, the veins, the way it lays on the page. How he made her hand look so real, I will never get over.

With each piece of art was a short bio. While the title of this piece is Rembrandt's mother, the bio said that it was a depiction of the prophetess Anna from the Bible. The only account of her is found in Luke after she saw Jesus as a baby.

And there was a prophetess, Anna, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was advanced in years, having lived with her husband seven years from when she was a virgin, and then as a window until she was eighty-four. She did not depart from the temple, worshiping with fasting and prayer night and day. And coming up at that very hour she began to give thanks to God and to speak of Him to all who were waiting for the redemption of Jerusalem. (Luke 2:36-38)

It seems, Anna practically lived at the temple. She probably heard the scriptures over and over, the ones that told of a coming Messiah. She most likely never touched or read them, but I imagine her face held the same eagerness found in this painting when she would listen. I think her heart ached and found purpose only in sitting in the Lord's presence. Can you imagine her joy to see her Savior's face as a babe?

I bought this postcard as a reminder: I want to be the woman in the painting. I want to be found pouring over scripture, now and when my hands are wrinkled and fragile. But then, that begs the questions: am I in the Word daily? Do I eagerly await to spend time with Him? Do I search the scriptures and commit truth to memory?

Chances are, if I'm not, I won't be like that woman. I won't be like Anna.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me." Psalm 51:10

Courageous the Movie

I am blessed to be a part of a church that, as I've said before, will do what's never been done if it means more people will hear the gospel. So, Sherwood Pictures was born as a ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church, and Flywheel, Facing the Giants, and Fireproof have made more of an impact than I think anyone ever dreamed. The latest film, Courageous, is about police officers who discover what it truly means to be a godly dad.  2 weeks ago, I had the opportunity to attend the Courageous movie premiere in Atlanta at the Fox Theater. It seemed only fitting for me to take the man in life: my Dad! So we strolled the red carpet, and had a great time!

  To give you more of an idea of the heart behind the movie, here are some of the actors and staff sharing about Courageous...



Courageous is about fatherhood, but this movie isn't just for dads. This young, single gal, was given examples of the kind of man I should look for, and reminded me that living a life worthy of the Lord is not always easy. We all must resolve to be courageous. 


Check out www.courageousthemovie.com for more info about the movie, resources for churches, theater showings, and more. Courageous comes out September 30th, make sure you're there!

Mi Tiempo en Honduras

Hola mi Amigos! (warning, you are about to recieve a spanish lesson)

I'm finally back and rested (I think) from my week in Honduras. This was my second trip to this beautiful country, and hopefully there are many more to come. I was first introduced to the country in May of 2010 on a mission trip with mi abuelos (my grandparents) and their church. I fell in love then with the people and left a little bit of my heart there. I was blessed to return a little over a week ago with another medical team to minister again to the mountain people.

Now, just to clarify: I am in no way medically trained. But you would be amazed at what you can do with a little instruction and in the middle of another country. Automated blood pressure cuffs, thermometers, and pulse oxcemeters (i don't even know all it does) are wonderful for those of us who can push a button and copy down a number. My last trip I used these to do triage, but last week, I worked with the dentist. Of the MANY patients that were treated in the clinics, roughly 125 of those had teeth extracted (fancy term for pulled). I was placed in charge of cleaning and sterilizing the doctor's instruments inbetween patients. I will say, I'm glad I don't mind a little blood and I now know the spanish word for a person to spit: esupa.

As a patient, the proceed for each clinic was:

Wait...

Triage (temp, BP, and pulse check)...

See healthcare provider (accompanied by a translator)...

Head to the pharamacy for meds...

...and here I am doing my part for the week: cleaning and sterlizing instruments used by Dr. Ted to pull teeth.

We were able to provide medical services to 1,150 people in 4 1/2. We worked with Iglesia Amistad Cristiana Church and helped reach communities that the church will follow up with. 

Another highlight of the week, was our visit to the police academy. It shocked me to find out that in Honduras, it is not standard issue for police officers to recieve a bullet-proof vest. We had the opportunity to take vests with us and distrubute them to several men and women. Dr. Daughtery, the American physcian leading our group, was able to present the vests and the gospel to the officers.

One of the Recreation Pastors at Sherwood was able to give me some soccer balls to take and pass out. Several kids waited around the clinic all day for a ball. This one was especially excited!

Now, allow me to introduce you to the "Fearsome Four". These lovely ladies and myself met in May 2010 on what would be all of our first trip to Honduras. We were blessed with the opportunity to all serve again together! It was great to catch up on all the Lord has done in our lives and to encourage each other. We're spread out all over the southeast, but are hoping for a reason to reunite soon ;) .

Thank you so much for praying for myself and our team as we served the mountain people of Honduras. This country and her beautiful people are becoming very near and dear to my heart. Returning there was like seeing old friends and family. I can't wait until the Lord opens a door to visit again.

Only fear the LORD and serve Him faithfully with all your heart. For consider what great things He has done for you. 1 Sam 12:24