My Irons

Without fail, November 1st automatically begins my mental "Thankful" list . Knowing myself, starting a daily post on Facebook would only prove forgetfulness by repeating myself or missing a day.  Last year, I actually posted a list here. 

As the mental list still grows and November comes to an end, there's one item on the list that the Lord seems to be putting in bold and underlining. 

Friends.

Which then brings to mind this verse... 

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

 So here are some of my "irons"...

Diana and I met when I was 16. Through what seemed random, but clearly God-orchestrated course of events and people, Diana and I later became college roommates my second semester at the University of Mobile. She is one of the smartest women I know, and can go on less sleep than anyone ever! Her passion for missions and the nations is contagious. While our stint as roommates wasn't that long, she'll forever be my college roomie. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for her honesty, transparency, and all around love for me in my life. Recently finished at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, she's headed overseas VERY soon, and I couldn't be prouder. The Lord's hand on her life is apparent in so many ways. 

This is Mary. Mary Carlisle that is. I can't really tell you when or how we met(when you live on a small college campus, introductions are sometimes left out. Its the beauty of living life with 500+ other people). But I would say our friendship was fortified as she watched me walk through a hard time in my life, and encouraged me all along the way. Mary is the writer and artist of my friends. She has talent in both areas that can only be attributed to the God we serve. She lives in Nashville and works for Lifeway. Around the holidays, you can probably find us at a Starbucks or Cracker Barrel having coffee as we both travel to our hometowns. Mary is my cheerleader and, thankfully, a skype call away.

Meet Laura Ashley. LA, her husband Lee, and their precious daughter Holland Grace currently live in Raleigh, North Carolina, attending seminary. They will finish soon there and in the next year head overseas as church planters and missionaries. 

Laura Ashley and I weren't super close through the beginning of our college years, but it all kinda changed when we went on a Youth Hostel Mission trip the summer before our final semester of college. LA was my only female friend and confidant (the guys on our team were OK, ;) ) for 32 days as we traveled through Europe learning what living out the gospel really looked like. Her patience with me during those days still amazes me. Watching her become a wife and mommy has been a blessing, even if its been from afar! 

When I first moved to Albany I wrote about my A-team: Ashleigh, Jaye, and Megan. While emails and calls are few and far between these girls are some of my most faithful prayer warriors. A week hardly goes by where I don't thank the Lord for one of them, or our time together as accountability partners. Ashleigh and Megan continue to hold down the fort at UM, while Jaye is working away at seminary in North Carolina. We'll be reunited for the first time since I moved this December! We're heading to New York City for New Years Eve!!

Ever had an unexpected friendship? If you have, you know that these happen at what seems like the most random moments and seem to solidify out of no where. At least that's what it felt like when Haley Casey stepped into my life. I don't know if I have ever been so blunt with someone, and yet they keep coming back for more! 
Haley is a teacher and the BEST bargain shopper I know. Her and her fiance, Jason, keep me laughing and help me lighten up. I'm so thankful the Lord saw fit to have Haley and I crash into each other's lives. Her encouragement in my life is one I try not to take for granted, and look forward to having around as long as I'm in Albany (which she says is forever). Only the Lord knows, Haley!


Last introduction: this is Stephanie. Steph and I work together at Sherwood. She's an incredible wife, mommy, teacher, writer, artist and party planner. I really can't begin to tell you how much this girl means to me. Steph and her husband, Ryan, let me invade their lives over a year ago and we do lots of life together now. From Thursday night dinners to birthday parties to late night talks of life, love, and Jesus. My day was made when their two year old son, Thompson, called me "Aunt Kristin". I love that little boy!!

Thanks for sticking it out and reading this long post. I promise it would be much longer if I mentioned Codi, Amanda, Mary Grace, Kayla... I'm telling you, the list goes on. Man, I am one blessed girl. 

Thank you Lord for these women whom you allow me to call friends. It is by Your grace they are in my life!

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

Josiah.

I'll never forget that spring day my freshmen year of college. The day I was baking a cake in the dorm kitchen and my mom called. She makes small talk, then asks with a laugh,

"Are you sitting down or standing up?"

 "Mom what's wrong?"

"Well, nothing is really wrong..."

"Is it good news or bad?"

"Well I think its good..."

And then it was like I just knew.

"Mom, are you pregnant?"

"Yes."

I would like to tell you that my first response was utter joy, and I behaved like a loving, excited daughter and big sister.

But that did not happen.

Confused, upset, aggravated. I thought they were done!?. Would all be accurate discriptions of how I felt those first few hours (ok, maybe days).

Over the following months, I came to grips with the fact my parents 9th child would grace us with his presence in October. I became excited about becoming a big sister. again. Was even able to be home a little more when Mom was put on bedrest. But I'm pretty sure nothing could prepare me for what we realized on that rainy October 22nd.

"He has DOWNS." was the word I got from my dad.

He what?

It took 3-4 weeks for the blood work to come back to confirm what the doctors suspected. However, it took our family no time to realize we knew little to nothing about Down Syndrome. Mom and Dad had been birthing and taking care of children for 20+ years, and it felt like suddenly they were brand new parents again. We all loved my new brother Josiah so much. Yet, there was this "fear of not knowing".

5 years later, Josiah is a joy and bright spot in my parents' home. Overflowing with personality!

He likes to swing and swim.
He is stubborn. 
He is funny.
He loves ice cream and popcorn.
He wears glasses.
He goes to school.
He snorts when he laughs.
He loves dogs.

Looking back I can see how the Lord placed people in my family's path to guide, help, and understand the next part of our journey. It has been a learning process for all of us, a road that at times (I know for my parents especially) has seemed long and hard. But it has also been a fun ride as a family. We have celebrated the smallest of victories, while smiling and laughing our heads off at seeing this world through Josiah's eyes.

Josiah's journey will probably be a lot different than others his age. But that's something we're ok with as a family. Because he is ours. 

Lord, forgive me for my selfishness as a college freshmen. 

Happy Birthday Josiah! I love you and love being your big sister!

Favorite Moments

To say the last 3 months have been a whirlwind would be an understatement. I keep thinking back and somehow this summer was busier than last year. I read my last blog and know that the Lord knew what He was doing giving that lesson then, ha!

Among my crazy, jam packed schedule were some really fun and favorite moments...

Photo by Angelique Sturm

... I had the honor to be in my friend Amanda's wedding in May. She made a beautiful bride...


 

...Had a young child randomly run up to me on a Sunday night, hug me, and say "Thanks for spending every Sunday with us."...

...Witnessed another friend and her groom worshiped our sweet Savior that brought them together during their ceremony. Oblivious to each other or anyone else...

...Watched 21 5th graders spread their wings and love on people they did not know...

...Held this sweet guy while his mom had her blood pressure checked during my week in Honduras. Saw a hesitant mom smile because we weren't uncomfortable around her little boy...

...saw 30 children stand saying they feel God is calling to some kind of ministry: pastor, missionary, or other vocation...lots of tears that day...



Photo by Hayley Catt

So yea, its been a crazy summer. But having it any other way, just wouldn't be worth it.

Shout for joy in the LORD, O you righteous! Praise befits the upright."

 Psalm 33:1

Be still. Literally.

I have spent the better part of the last week with my planner in hand and my eyes looking at the months of May, June and July over and over again. Its part of my job that I love: the planning. Creating something out of a empty white square on my calendar. The I in my SI-personality (see DISC profile) sees every gathering of people a party. A chance to hang out and get work done...well, maybe the later, definitely the first!

In my family I'm notorious for always doing something, going somewhere, or seeing someone. I've always liked being on the move, never wanting to miss anything. I mean, who would want to miss a party?!

But...yea, big but coming... in all the commotion of my life, two scriptures come to mind. 

"Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted among the earth!" Psalm 46:10

"And He (Jesus) awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm." Mark 4:39

I learned a long time ago that one reason He calls us to "be still" is because we try to fix and do all by ourselves. His call to us to this "be still" is so we stand before Him, with humble adoration and in prayer. Depending on Him to fight the battle, correct the wrong, show the answer, work out the problem. He is faithful to be our Provider and Caretaker.

But then there is this whole other "be still" that the Lord has been working on with me. The actual "being" still part, literally. 

Yea, I'm not so great at it. 

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy an hour by myself laying out by the pool, or getting lost in a book for a few hours. But being by myself a whole lot ain't my thing.

But then when did being still mean being a hermit? Why did I ever think they were equivalent? 

Maybe because some times the Lord saying "be still" literally does mean "don't do anything. don't make dinner plans. don't run errands all over town. stay home". It some times means saying... "No" (Heavens, I don't like to say it!). The social butterfly in me desires to flit about, but my Creator calls me to rest. My body, mind, and soul.

 I think on the next weeks and months, and realize my summer is pretty much planned. Lots of fun and exciting stuff set in place that will no doubt make a memorable season in which I pray God moves. But tonight, I write this sitting out on my balcony feeling a wonderful, God-given breeze in the ever present South Georgia heat. 

Being still before my Savior. Resting.

My Office

Little girls don't grow up dreaming of their own office one day. At least this one didn't.

In college I was assigned to plan my "dream" classroom. After that project I decided it was a good thing I wasn't really planning on teaching because I couldn't afford it, ha.

But since starting a full time job, I've realized why people take time and effort to create an office space they enjoy. I spend more time in the fours walls of my little office than I do awake in my own apartment. During particular times of the year I'm out of it more than in it (summer IS coming), but I always come back to my office.

The decorating process has been just that: a process. Lots of things are mismatched at this point, but a couple of staples you'd find: a large white board, lamps, IKEA chairs, a massive bookcase and a window. How I ended up with a window I will NEVER know, but credit can probably be given to my great boss/pastor. Bottom line: I love my window.

My office. big whoop-ti-doo, right?

Well, here's the thing... its one of my favorite places.

Yes, there is probably 3 month old candy in a jar or bucket...
Yes, there are probably t-shirts in a pile leftover from an event...
Yes, there is probably another stack of supplies for the NEXT event...
Yes, I know there is popcorn on the floor...
Yes, I realize nothing matches and that there is construction work outside...

But its still a favorite place.

In a short time its become a place for sweet, meaningful conversations with friends. A place for laughs around Wednesday staff popcorn. A place for tears behind a closed door when unexpected news hits. A place to view and reflect on the art/cards/pictures made by, and of, my precious kiddos.

But mostly because it is an honest, safe place where I can go before my Father, and where encouragement can go back and forth across my desk.

Praying the Lord has given you a favorite place.

Get up.

Somewhere over the years past I heard a sermon discussing Moses and Joshua. While I do not remember the three points or alliteration, I do remember something that the pastor pointed out...

and its something that God recently reminded me of...

to which I then explained to Him that the story didn't pertain to me at this point in my life...

and we can all guess how that ended.
So let me share the lesson I've learned (actually, still learning).

The last chapter in Deuteronomy tells of the Lord showing Moses the Promised Land. He could not enter, but he saw it from Mount Nebo. The chapter goes on to tell of Moses' death, burial, and the people of Israel's mourning.

I have a feeling that while some might have known that Moses was not to enter the Promised Land, they were shocked when he died. Verse 7 says,

"Moses was 120 years old when he died. His eye was undimmed, and his vigor unabated."

The man the people of Israel had followed through parted water and barren desert was gone and quite suddenly it seems. After Verse 8 goes on to say the days of mourning ended and the hand-off happened. Joshua, son of Nun, was up. He had been blessed by Moses, so they all knew it was coming, and they responded with obedience. **Side Note: can I just say, that's a big deal! Let's think about it... If these people had been wandering in the desert for 40 years, and had dwindled down to only the descendants of Caleb and Joshua... I think it is safe bet to say that those left, had lived their entire lives under Moses' leadership. If not the entirety, then a good bit of it. So they have to trust, follow someone else after spending your life under someone else?? I believe it to be a testament of who they really were submitting themselves to: God Almighty Himself. (Granted, I know that the children of Israel didn't always do what they were suppose to, but at that moment they were on it.)

Moving on. 
Deuteronomy ends, Joshua (and God's lesson for me) begins.
 

"After the death of Moses, the servant of the LORD, the LORD said to Joshua the son of Nun, Moses' assistant, 'Moses my servant is dead. Now therefore arise, go...' "

(Joshua 1:1-2a)

 

Do you really think God needed to inform Joshua that Moses was dead? That somehow he missed it and God needed to highlight the fact that the great prophet wasn't around anymore? That the man who had poured into Joshua and blessed him to lead God's people was GONE?

 

Now, I'm not Joshua, nor am I trying to downplay his role in scripture. He was a man of God and may I remind you one of two that had faith that the Lord would give them the Promised Land (Numbers 13). But in my human flesh I can imagine what it would be like to lose such an important person. To be so consumed with my circumstances that God has to state the obvious.

 

Lord, I miss him...

HE IS DEAD.

They won't trust me....
ARISE.
I can't do this. I can't lead them. How can I?
GET UP. GO...

I try to hold on to things. Good times, good memories, friendships. Re-living in my mind seasons of life that I'm glad God gave me. When I sense God moving me on, I squeeze those things tight and say, "O no God. Please, just let me keep it. Don't make me try something new." So in my clinging and re-living, I don't see the opportunities that God has in front of me. I don't want to move on to try something new or trust something/someone new. So I hold on to what is comfortable and familiar. But as I sat in a corner, holding on for dear life, mourning, sadden that a season is over,  the Lord steps in to end it.

He says... ARISE.
Or is Kristinense: GET. UP. 

Now, please hear me. I'm not saying you shouldn't mourn or be sad when you lose someone or you move on to a different season of life. I'm saying that I have the tendency to dwell  on it past a reasonable time and it takes our sweet Lord intervening to get me out of a rut. He stated the obvious and gave instruction. Because He loves you and I too much and has better things in store for His glory than to let us wallow in a corner.

The rest of verse 2 and 3 say...

"Moses my servant is dead. Now therefore arise, go over this Jordan, you and all this people, into the land that I am giving to then, to the people of Israel. Every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given to you, just as I promised to Moses."

The Promised Land was waiting!!! He was giving instruction to go to the place that they had waited on for YEARS. WHOO HOO! How awesome to look at what was ahead. Better still, God goes on to reminds Joshua how He will be with him just like He was with Moses. How Joshua was not to be frightened or dismayed, but to be strong and courageous (v. 9).

Its time to get up. He promises to not to leave or forsake His own. Why would we delay?

1 Year

The last 2 months have been marked with many 1 year anniversaries. From sending my resume to Sherwood, to my first weekend, to THE interview at Cracker Barrel, to the big move to the small city. I can be very sappy at times, and coming out of the holiday season has probably only made it worse. Its made me look over the last year quite a bit and all the lessons I've learned, the most important I wrote about previously.

Among those lessons, I've learned so much about myself, and about the high points of  life. For example...

• Hearing "Miss Kristin" thrills my heart, and it is a true delight to have a child run up shouting it, while reaching for a hug. I cannot explain it other than to say it is one of those small, sweet gifts from the Lord. With that, comes this unusual "momma bear" instinct that can only come from being around some many precious children.

• It has been cool to see how God ordained certain life experiences to prepare me for this season of my life. For instance, my degree and time spent working at UM aided me in having a teacher and event planner brain all at the same time. Being from a large family has helped know how to handle multiple people of different ages. I always have an example story for a child or parent about one of my siblings, ha. All that to say, the least important  of instants to me, have been purposeful to God's plan.

• It is a great joy to stand by dear friends as they take on a new last name, and holding sweet babies whose parents I call friends. THAT, ladies and gentlemen, I've learned is one of the greatest joys of this life. To watch and be a part of monumental moments of those you have laughed, cried and prayed over...ugh I could cry just thinking about it!

• My brothers and sisters are growing up. A given I know. But it hit me hard this year. Samuel started college, John started middle school, and Madelyn can see the light at the end of the tunnel called high school. Josiah isn't a baby anymore and is a rambunctious little boy. Before we know it, we'll all be married and cramming into my parents house for holidays.

• I don't have to plan every second of my day, and it is healthy for me... sometimes.

All in all, I cannot express how good the Lord has been to me since moving to Albany. Its been a great year, and I am looking forward to however many more the Lord will give me at Sherwood!

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Ephesians 3:20-21