Save-the-Dates

I like to remember dates. I like trying to remember what happened on exact days one, two, or five years ago. Doing so reminds me of how timely the Lord really is, and how He redeems time spent. 

While more of the world reflects back in December,  January has served as a month of reflection for me in a lot of ways. This month has come to hold a lot of mile markers: my birthday, anniversary at Sherwood, and moving to Albany to name a few. 

This year looking back has a few more milestones to it. It was in January of last year where I surrendered to the Lord my fear, I let Adam into my life, and finally, he and I became a "we". Its been fun as these specific dates have gone by to share with each other the apprehensive thoughts we had, and now laugh at how we are discussing registries and guest lists. Or like how today I met with my wedding hairstylist and florist, and a year ago today I was getting ready for our first date. Add on the fact that in 99 days we will get married!

Yep, I like dates.  The counting up and the remembering. The seeing how the Lord works all things together for my good and His purpose (Romans 8:28).

Save your dates friends. Let the Lord bring to remembrance hard and good times. He was there for all of them. 

The Proposal

You may have saw on some type of social media, or maybe heard through the grapevine, but something big has happened in my life. 

4 weeks ago, this guy asked me to marry him...

and I said yes. 

Now if you had a front row seat to watch it all unfold, or if you read this, you can testify that the last ten months have been nothing short of a "But God" moment. One where He stepped in, changed my heart completely, and gave me the gift of falling in love with a man that loves Christ above all. 

This post is tell you our engagement story (mainly because people are supposedly "dying" to hear the story...Tammy and Hank! ;) ). So it's going to be long...because I'm not leaving out the small details. Here's THE story. 

First, let me cover the basic questions: Did I know it was coming? Did I tell him the ring I wanted? The answer is yes and no to both. Adam and I had talked about how the Lord was leading us to marriage, so yes I some what knew it would happen in a certain time frame. He asked what I liked as far as a ring went, but it was a 5 minutes conversation that happened months ago. 

The week before Thanksgiving, Adam was scheduled to help run lights for SCA's high school musical, Beauty and the Beast. This meant rehearsals for Tuesday and Wednesday night, and performances on Thursday, Friday and two on Saturday. I attended the Thursday night performance, and after Adam and I went to eat with our close friends Scott and Marie.

**Side note: We spend a lot of time with Scott and Marie. Its been a joke for a few months that when it comes to secrets Scott is the one to tell, not Marie. Scott is the closest thing to a human Fort Knox I've ever met. No lie. 

At dinner Marie asked if I wanted to go shopping in Tallahassee on Saturday. Thinking Adam would be busy with two performances, I said, "Sure, as long as I don't have to babysit for Renee. She's supposed to let me know if she needs me Friday or Saturday." {Cue first curve ball I threw Adam. Let's just say he made some speedy phone calls the next morning making sure I babysat Friday. Also, I randomly decide to go get a manicure Friday during the day. RANDOM, people. I don't make this a habit.}

Saturday morning comes and I'm getting ready for Marie to pick me up. {Woke up before my alarm, had time to curl my hair, and decided not to look grungy. As in, I put thought into what I was wearing. Again, I'm look back and go, "Why in the world did I do that? That's not really normal of me..."}.

Marie and I drove to Tallahassee, Florida passing through downtown Thomasville, Georgia. This is one of Adam and I's favorite places. It has fun, cool shops and restaurants, and where we went on one of our first dates. That date included a trip to the Big Oak {complete with a park and gazebo}, which is a location that comes into play later :) . Marie at this point mentions that on the way back she'd like to stop and look at the bookstore downtown. 

I need to throw in that at this part of the ride I'm beginning to not feel well. Not full blown car sick, but something similar. We aren't even to Tallahassee yet and I'm wondering if this is such a good idea. But we go on, have lunch at Panera and head to the mall. Of course in the car and walking around we talk "what ifs" of weddings and married life. Its just want girls do... especially if you are two girls in serious relationships. Before we leave the mall we went in a jewelry store, so I could point on the cut of diamond I liked. {Marie ends up talking to a lady who pulls out a ring that looked a LOT like the ring I would see later on in the day.}

Its get to be early afternoon,  and I'm kind of done with the whole shopping thing {which ends up being curve ball #2}. I'm definitely ready to get on to Thomasville. I remembered that the shops closed around 5 or 5:30pm, so I prompt Marie to the idea of heading back. Its only a 30 minute drive to Thomasville, so no big deal... until Marie starts driving 15 mph under the speed limit...which I notice and call her out on. Lucky for her, there were road work signs out. 

We get to downtown and are taking our time looking around the bookstore. What I don't know is that Adam and Scott are FLYING to Thomasville because we are early. {Marie is suppose to have me at the Big Oak at 6pm. Its 5:15pm. I'm ready to eat and go!} I had mentioned to Marie that we could eat dinner at this cool little pizza place, and was starting to hint that I was ready to eat {have I mentioned I didn't feel good?}. So Marie and I get in the car, and I start trying to direct her to the pizza place. She then acts busy on her phone and goes the opposite way for EVERY. TURN. I tell her. She gets all distracted, borderline ditzy, and ends up driving past the Big Oak, which is conveniently a block and a half from the pizza place {walking distance, people. Even though this was not a part of the plan.}. I point out where we are, and she asks about the Big Oak. As I explain what it is, why its important to Adam and I, she parks and I then become busy trying to figure out if the pizza place is open for dinner. I start to walk up to it, then turn to find Marie walking in the opposite direction. {I really think I probably gave her the most confused, aggravated look possible.}

"I thought we'd just walk down there! Check it out before it gets dark." She says with a smile. 

"Ok, sure." Literally thinking, Of course you do. Because this day could not have worked out any other way. My hair is curled.  I like what I'm wearing. We just saw a ring I love. I love this little town, and this would be the perfect opportunity for my boyfriend to surprise me... but he's not. Because he is watching Beauty and the Beast for the fourth time. Lord, please get a hold of these thoughts!! They are ruining my time with my friend!

As we begin walking downhill, I see a little white truck roll through the four-way stop at the corner of the park. 

"Ok, that's just weird." 

Marie mentions something about a nearby house and I feel myself look at her as if she was from another planet. My heart is racing and I'm beginning to walk slower. 

"This isn't happening, Kristin. Get. a. grip. "

We get to the edge of this little park and I see movement under the massive oak tree branches. Out walks Adam from beneath the tree...in a suit...looking pale. Cue me freezing in place. {He says his first thought was , She's really gonna make me walk all the way up to her"}.

He gets to me and it all happened really fast...

Me-"What are you doing here??"
Him-"What do you think I'm doing here?!.. Take a walk with me?"
"Sure..." 
Walking while he says, "I've really lied a lot to you lately..."
"I'm sure it was for a good reason..."
Takes me over to the gazebo stairs. Drops to one knee, "Will you marry me?"
"YES!"

Scott {who rode with Adam} and Marie hid to take some pictures, and came out once we called for them. We celebrated at our favorite restaurant, Jonah's, and called our parents. In between it all, I got the details of Adam's side: from the curve balls I threw him, to the lies he told to cover up the surprise. 

All in all, it was a great night, and the Lord gave us a great story to tell. We have been BLESSED beyond measure by all the love and encouragement we've been given by friends and family. {Also happy to say Scott and Marie got engaged exactly 2 weeks after us!!}

So there you have it: I'm engaged, and the soon-to-be Kristin Crosby. Has a nice ring, don't ya think?

"For the LORD is good; His steadfast love endures forever, and His faithfulness to all generations." Psalm 100:5

Adam.

I couldn't stand him. Could. not. 

Truth be known, he couldn't really stand me either in the beginning. I thought he was arrogant and over confident. He thought I was stuck up and a stick in the mud. 

To make things worse (or more humorous now), we actually told people we didn't really like the other. 

But today... I'm beyond grateful that that's not the end of our story.

After a few months, in the midst of working together and having a few mutual friends, little by little Adam Crosby grew on me. At first it was a tolerance for someone who seemed very different than me. Next, it grew to a respectful camaraderie as co-workers. That's how it stay on my end for a while. I eventually had to admit that the more I got to know him, the more he seemed likable. (But definitely not date-able!)

I can remember that during that time, I shared my thoughts with a godly, much wiser woman in my life. I told her that Adam just wasn't what I was looking for. To me, he didn't seem like a good fit at all, and all the things I wanted in someone (you know, someone not arrogant or over confident). 

Then this dear friend, who is cautious when putting her two-cents in on my life, said to me very sweetly and kindly, "All I'll say is this, you might actually need someone a little confident in your life so he's not a one of these..." as she referred to the rug under her feet.

Ouch.

 I can literally replay in my mind that conversation we had in her kitchen. I can remember how her words stuck to me. They still do. Because while the wall around my heart was 10 feet tall and five feet deep, it was at the moment that the wall cracked the tiniest sliver and I said, "Really, Lord?". 

Shortly after, I finally laid it before God and said,"Ok. I'll be open to the possibility of dating Adam." (do you hear my skepticism?) It was then that I began to see past his, as he would call it, "hard candy shell". I saw his go-getter attitude and drive to do things right and with excellence. His ability to confidently say he would do something and follow it through to the nth degree. His passion to see students in our church grow into godly men and women. Add on the fact the he started making me laugh (it really doesn't take much, but hey, it was new coming from him).

To try and wrap up this story, after four months of saying "Nope" "No" "NO!" to folks around me, myself, and even God, I realized that I actually liked and wanted to spend time with him. So I sat before the Lord, and got REAL honest with Him and myself.

"I'm scared."
"Trust Me."
"God I'm not even sure I like him..."
"Trust Me."
"But what about..."
"Trust Me. "
"But what if..."
"Trust ME. Not him. Not the situation. Me. Take a step, and trust Me."

So after an awkward middle school moment on my end of, "hey..I like you...back", Adam took me out of my 25th birthday. Our first date.

(This is a first of a couple of posts. Stay tuned for the engagement story!)

Bright Plaid Shorts

It never ceases to amaze me all that kids pick up, repeat, remember, or say without any prompting from adults. I guess it is one of the reasons I love children and find them so intriguing. God teaches me so much as I try and see the world from their perspective. Last night was no different.

I did a couple of quick laps around the block with a friend of mine (this whole exercising thing has never been quite my forte'), and then headed  to a dear friend's' house to watch her three year old daughter for a few hours. I show up with Chick-fila in hand, and wearing my "work out" cloths: long sleeve t-shirt, leggings and gym shorts. Cue curious Kerianne...

"Miss Kristin, um why are you wearing shorts over your pants?"

"Well, these are actually leggings, and I wear them to keep my legs warm while I exercise."

"Um well you're wearing shorts over your pants." She said in a "that's ridiculous"  voice.  I just laughed as we sat down to some dinner. 

After a while, she began to dress up and show me her blue and pink wedding dresses (actually, they are princess dresses that she calls wedding dresses and I'm not even sure she's ever been to a wedding... is it innate for little girls to dream of weddings? another topic, another day...). Then all of a sudden she appears in her normal shirt and pants with one addition: a pair of bright plaid shorts. 

"Look Miss Kristin, I match!" 

At first I didn't get it. Only on the second or third time of her saying "I MATCH!" did it dawn on me: she matched ME!

Now, no worries, I don't think I scared her fashion sense for life. But standing in my friend's kitchen, watching her curly headed, bright eyed daughter look up at me with a grin... it all became much more real. 

I'm not saying shorts and leggings are bad. 
I'm not saying they are fashionable. 
They actually look quite ridiculous.

I'm saying that little ones watch, whether they are 3 or 13 or 23. The soak up and pay attention to more details than we realize. I can still name the 12th graders that I watched, as a 6th grader, walk into the cafeteria. My friends and I were enamored with the idea of being the star football player, head cheerleader, and the most popular. 

So they watch, what's the big deal?

The big deal is that as followers of Christ we are to point all people to the cross and our Savior. Point them with our walk, our talk, our dress, our work, our life. 

Praise the Lord that only Christ knows the details and depths of my sin and shortcomings, and uses me anyway. Praise Him that He gives gentle reminders that we are His light in this dark and dying world. Reminders like bright plaid shorts. 

"...I will make you as a light for the nations, that my salvation may reach to the end of the earth." Isaiah 49:6b

My Irons

Without fail, November 1st automatically begins my mental "Thankful" list . Knowing myself, starting a daily post on Facebook would only prove forgetfulness by repeating myself or missing a day.  Last year, I actually posted a list here. 

As the mental list still grows and November comes to an end, there's one item on the list that the Lord seems to be putting in bold and underlining. 

Friends.

Which then brings to mind this verse... 

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

 So here are some of my "irons"...

Diana and I met when I was 16. Through what seemed random, but clearly God-orchestrated course of events and people, Diana and I later became college roommates my second semester at the University of Mobile. She is one of the smartest women I know, and can go on less sleep than anyone ever! Her passion for missions and the nations is contagious. While our stint as roommates wasn't that long, she'll forever be my college roomie. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for her honesty, transparency, and all around love for me in my life. Recently finished at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, she's headed overseas VERY soon, and I couldn't be prouder. The Lord's hand on her life is apparent in so many ways. 

This is Mary. Mary Carlisle that is. I can't really tell you when or how we met(when you live on a small college campus, introductions are sometimes left out. Its the beauty of living life with 500+ other people). But I would say our friendship was fortified as she watched me walk through a hard time in my life, and encouraged me all along the way. Mary is the writer and artist of my friends. She has talent in both areas that can only be attributed to the God we serve. She lives in Nashville and works for Lifeway. Around the holidays, you can probably find us at a Starbucks or Cracker Barrel having coffee as we both travel to our hometowns. Mary is my cheerleader and, thankfully, a skype call away.

Meet Laura Ashley. LA, her husband Lee, and their precious daughter Holland Grace currently live in Raleigh, North Carolina, attending seminary. They will finish soon there and in the next year head overseas as church planters and missionaries. 

Laura Ashley and I weren't super close through the beginning of our college years, but it all kinda changed when we went on a Youth Hostel Mission trip the summer before our final semester of college. LA was my only female friend and confidant (the guys on our team were OK, ;) ) for 32 days as we traveled through Europe learning what living out the gospel really looked like. Her patience with me during those days still amazes me. Watching her become a wife and mommy has been a blessing, even if its been from afar! 

When I first moved to Albany I wrote about my A-team: Ashleigh, Jaye, and Megan. While emails and calls are few and far between these girls are some of my most faithful prayer warriors. A week hardly goes by where I don't thank the Lord for one of them, or our time together as accountability partners. Ashleigh and Megan continue to hold down the fort at UM, while Jaye is working away at seminary in North Carolina. We'll be reunited for the first time since I moved this December! We're heading to New York City for New Years Eve!!

Ever had an unexpected friendship? If you have, you know that these happen at what seems like the most random moments and seem to solidify out of no where. At least that's what it felt like when Haley Casey stepped into my life. I don't know if I have ever been so blunt with someone, and yet they keep coming back for more! 
Haley is a teacher and the BEST bargain shopper I know. Her and her fiance, Jason, keep me laughing and help me lighten up. I'm so thankful the Lord saw fit to have Haley and I crash into each other's lives. Her encouragement in my life is one I try not to take for granted, and look forward to having around as long as I'm in Albany (which she says is forever). Only the Lord knows, Haley!


Last introduction: this is Stephanie. Steph and I work together at Sherwood. She's an incredible wife, mommy, teacher, writer, artist and party planner. I really can't begin to tell you how much this girl means to me. Steph and her husband, Ryan, let me invade their lives over a year ago and we do lots of life together now. From Thursday night dinners to birthday parties to late night talks of life, love, and Jesus. My day was made when their two year old son, Thompson, called me "Aunt Kristin". I love that little boy!!

Thanks for sticking it out and reading this long post. I promise it would be much longer if I mentioned Codi, Amanda, Mary Grace, Kayla... I'm telling you, the list goes on. Man, I am one blessed girl. 

Thank you Lord for these women whom you allow me to call friends. It is by Your grace they are in my life!

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

Josiah.

I'll never forget that spring day my freshmen year of college. The day I was baking a cake in the dorm kitchen and my mom called. She makes small talk, then asks with a laugh,

"Are you sitting down or standing up?"

 "Mom what's wrong?"

"Well, nothing is really wrong..."

"Is it good news or bad?"

"Well I think its good..."

And then it was like I just knew.

"Mom, are you pregnant?"

"Yes."

I would like to tell you that my first response was utter joy, and I behaved like a loving, excited daughter and big sister.

But that did not happen.

Confused, upset, aggravated. I thought they were done!?. Would all be accurate discriptions of how I felt those first few hours (ok, maybe days).

Over the following months, I came to grips with the fact my parents 9th child would grace us with his presence in October. I became excited about becoming a big sister. again. Was even able to be home a little more when Mom was put on bedrest. But I'm pretty sure nothing could prepare me for what we realized on that rainy October 22nd.

"He has DOWNS." was the word I got from my dad.

He what?

It took 3-4 weeks for the blood work to come back to confirm what the doctors suspected. However, it took our family no time to realize we knew little to nothing about Down Syndrome. Mom and Dad had been birthing and taking care of children for 20+ years, and it felt like suddenly they were brand new parents again. We all loved my new brother Josiah so much. Yet, there was this "fear of not knowing".

5 years later, Josiah is a joy and bright spot in my parents' home. Overflowing with personality!

He likes to swing and swim.
He is stubborn. 
He is funny.
He loves ice cream and popcorn.
He wears glasses.
He goes to school.
He snorts when he laughs.
He loves dogs.

Looking back I can see how the Lord placed people in my family's path to guide, help, and understand the next part of our journey. It has been a learning process for all of us, a road that at times (I know for my parents especially) has seemed long and hard. But it has also been a fun ride as a family. We have celebrated the smallest of victories, while smiling and laughing our heads off at seeing this world through Josiah's eyes.

Josiah's journey will probably be a lot different than others his age. But that's something we're ok with as a family. Because he is ours. 

Lord, forgive me for my selfishness as a college freshmen. 

Happy Birthday Josiah! I love you and love being your big sister!

Favorite Moments

To say the last 3 months have been a whirlwind would be an understatement. I keep thinking back and somehow this summer was busier than last year. I read my last blog and know that the Lord knew what He was doing giving that lesson then, ha!

Among my crazy, jam packed schedule were some really fun and favorite moments...

Photo by Angelique Sturm

... I had the honor to be in my friend Amanda's wedding in May. She made a beautiful bride...


 

...Had a young child randomly run up to me on a Sunday night, hug me, and say "Thanks for spending every Sunday with us."...

...Witnessed another friend and her groom worshiped our sweet Savior that brought them together during their ceremony. Oblivious to each other or anyone else...

...Watched 21 5th graders spread their wings and love on people they did not know...

...Held this sweet guy while his mom had her blood pressure checked during my week in Honduras. Saw a hesitant mom smile because we weren't uncomfortable around her little boy...

...saw 30 children stand saying they feel God is calling to some kind of ministry: pastor, missionary, or other vocation...lots of tears that day...



Photo by Hayley Catt

So yea, its been a crazy summer. But having it any other way, just wouldn't be worth it.

Shout for joy in the LORD, O you righteous! Praise befits the upright."

 Psalm 33:1